To everything there is a season

A time for every purpose under the sun;
A time to be born and a time to die;
a time to plant and a time to weed;
a time to call and a time to poll.

You could feel it in the air last week. The garbage gulls feasted on the curb offerings heated by the happy sun. The potholes breathed a sigh of relief as the last studded snowtire was finally put away for the year. And the dandelion began its annual takeover of lawns. As St. John's witnessed the ritual start of the seasonal struggle between homeowner and dandelion, everyone knew who was going to win. Yet habit and custom pushed voters outside, where they could be seen throughout the East End, on bended knee, fixated on the yellow apparition.

For those of you who missed the news because you were out in the yard, here are the highlights:

1) DW made a heroic phone call.
http://www.cbc.ca/canada/newfoundland-labrador/story/2009/05/20/williams-nurses-520.html

2) In the midst of a global recession, the capital bubble is unperturbed.
http://www.vocm.com/news-info.asp?id=36293

3) Bob Simmonds is optimistic.
http://www.vocm.com/news-info.asp?id=36262

4) The House of Assembly passed a motion calling for the federal government to do something it is already doing.
http://www.vocm.com/news-info.asp?id=36268

5) The federal and provincial governments have partnered.
http://www.vocm.com/news-info.asp?id=36313

Quite a week. Whether it was the power of polls, or something in the water, the nurses' strike was averted and I, for one, was happy to be proved wrong. Now I'm going outside to pull up some more dandelions. I know that they will return as soon as I pull them up, but I just can't help myself.

Judging from the news, things look good in Sunny Patch: http://orwellianspin.blogspot.com/2009/03/political-biology.html

Principle & Practice

The Principle: In a hierarchically structured administration, people tend to be promoted up to their "level of incompetence."

The Practice: No major changes in cabinet. No shakeup at Health.

Links to the Peter Principle:
http://pespmc1.vub.ac.be/PETERPR.html
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peter_principle
http://www.amazon.ca/Peter-Principle-Laurence-J/dp/1568491611

Links to the Danny Practice:
http://www.vocm.com/news-info.asp?id=35373
http://www.thetelegram.com/index.cfm?sid=240860&sc=79
http://www.cbc.ca/canada/newfoundland-labrador/story/2009/04/09/education-cabinet-shuffle-408.html

What Wiseman Doesn't Know

From Hansard, April 7th:

"If I could, Mr. Speaker, I will provide an update to the member opposite and to the House."
[In response to the question, "where is the evidence that communications and protocols are being put in place and being followed within Eastern Health?"]

"Mr. Speaker, the real answer to that question is that there is an issue of reasonableness here. What is the role of the government, what is the role of the health authority, and what should they do? If you look at Hansard, Mr. Speaker – this is ironic, if you read from Hansard, because Hansard records what people say in this House."
[In response to the question, "Why are you and your department not practicing proper follow up on this issue?"]

"Mr. Speaker, I need to understand what goes wrong so we can find a remedy."
[In response to the question, "Have you identified who made the judgements on Friday, and has the shot yet been fired across their bow, as the Premier indicated yesterday?"]

"If the member opposite has some information about her recent resignation, then I will commit to investigate in terms of that particular resignation and what plans are in place, actually, to provide a replacement for her, but the most current information I had was that the individual was going to be on a sick leave and returning around the middle of April, I say, Mr. Speaker."
[In response to a question on the resignation of the nurse practitioner at the HIV/AIDS clinic.]

"I understood that Eastern Health had made arrangements as an alternate plan while that individual was on sick leave and pending to come back around the middle of April. I will undertake to find out what the new plan will be, now that the member opposite has become aware that the resignation was tendered this morning....That is not something that I would ordinarily know...."
[In response to a question on the resignation of the nurse practitioner at the HIV/AIDS clinic.]
http://www.assembly.nl.ca/business/hansard/ga46session2/09-04-07.htm

No wonder he's such a very busy minister: that's a lot of non-knowing for one question period. So let's do a tally of where things stand before he speaks in public again.

In just three weeks of work, Wiseman didn't know:

1) That the only nurse-practitioner of the HIV/AIDS clinic had resigned:
http://www.cbc.ca/canada/newfoundland-labrador/story/2009/04/08/aids-clinic-nurse-048.html

2) That Eastern Health would release the new cancer test information last Friday: http://orwellianspin.blogspot.com/2009/04/fantasy-island.html

3) Changes in the rates for personal care homes in Newfoundland and Labrador: http://orwellianspin.blogspot.com/2009/04/freudian-slips.html

4) What is happening on a day-to-day basis at an operational level at many health authorities: http://orwellianspin.blogspot.com/2009/03/more-wisecracks.html

5) That he was supposed to show up at a major health conference: http://orwellianspin.blogspot.com/2009/03/busyness_31.html

6) That he was supposed to let the media in to hear him speak:
http://orwellianspin.blogspot.com/2009/03/wisecrack.html

Here's some food for thought: Wiseman is surrounded by an army of communications people. He faces a decimated opposition. After the coverage of the Cameron Report, there have been five major news cyclyes, none of which have focused on Wiseman's portfolio: Curious George Baker's circus and its aftermath; the tragedy of the helicopter crash; the bold and brilliant Throne Speech and budget; the debate and non-celebration of 60 years in Confederation; and the Hydro announcement.

The latest failure in his portfolio was overshadowed by DW shooting off his mouth. As for the current news cycle, the story of the resignation of the nurse practitioner is going up against the announcement of a new discovery of hydrocarbons off Newfoundland. I wonder which story will attract the most attention....http://www.cbc.ca/canada/newfoundland-labrador/story/2009/04/08/statoilhydro-offshore-find.html

To put the problems in Health in context, Orwellian News contacted an international expert in unknowledge, Donald Rumsfeld. Reached by phone in Washington, Rumsfeld had this to say: "There are known knowns. There are things we know that we know. There are known unknowns. That is to say, there are things that we now know we don’t know. But there are also unknown unknowns. There are things we do not know we don’t know. And then there's Ross Wiseman."

Rumsfeld recommended that Wiseman view his instructional video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_RpSv3HjpEw

Dunderisms

A sampling of yesterday's Dunderisms, as reported in Hansard:

1) "All I can say is we should all give thanks that the Leader of the Opposition is not a general in some war, because she would be posting regularly when her next surprise attack is coming."

2) "Mr. Speaker, there is no trouble to know that Roger has been around for the last couple of weeks. The only problem is, Mr. Speaker, it is great when they ask questions but it is just too bad that they waited seven years to do so."

3) "Mr. Speaker, I know the Leader of the Opposition spends an awful lot of time listening to the radio - that is where they get most of their questions for Question Period - but she missed an exciting announcement again from Newfoundland and Labrador Hydro yesterday when they reduced again the sulphur content of the fuel that is being used at Hydro."

4) "Now, Mr. Speaker, this energy plan has been lauded right throughout this country and through the world as a visionary statement, and lays down very clearly a plan for energy development for the next forty, fifty years, Mr. Speaker. I would suggest that the Leader of the Opposition spend a little bit more time with it and get some feedback from people outside of the Province, and outside of her own office."

5) "We share this information on a regular basis. It is important to us that the people of Newfoundland and Labrador know what we are doing. Not like the last deal, Mr. Speaker, not like the last deal that these people tried to negotiate back in 2002. We have developed the expertise within Nalcor and within Newfoundland and Labrador Hydro to be able to facilitate this kind of planning and to make these kinds of commercial arrangements."

6) "This is not all being done from the Premier’s Office like it was done under Premier Grimes [sic] Administration, Mr. Speaker."

7) "It runs right across the full membership of the Opposition. They never let the facts get in the way of a good story."

Blowing that much hot air must be a hard afternoon's work. Seven gratuitous insults hurled at the Opposition in just one question period, plus three irrelevant references to an administration that held power six years ago.

Who knew that Roger Grimes still loomed so large in the minds of such masterfully optimistic cabinet ministers? Who knew that a decimated Opposition with so few members could get a bold and brilliant cabinet minister so agitated and spiteful?

No wonder DW wanted a clean sweep in the last election. Here's the link to Hansard:
http://www.assembly.nl.ca/business/hansard/ga46session2/09-04-01.htm


NOT(X) = X Update:
http://labradore.blogspot.com/2009/04/dundredale-denies-deed-done.html

Busyness

Now that all the officially-approved shouting about the magical have status and the mastery of destiny has died down (if only momentarily), it might be useful to consider the actual state of health care.

I was going to write a post about the scandalous state of health care. But there isn't much that one can add to the reporting already done by CBC: htttp://www.cbc.ca/canada/newfoundland-labrador/story/2009/03/30/surgery-urology.html
http://www.cbc.ca/canada/newfoundland-labrador/story/2008/09/12/or-crunch.html
http://www.cbc.ca/health/story/2009/03/27/doctor-recruitment.html
http://www.cbc.ca/canada/newfoundland-labrador/story/2009/03/25/wiseman-dialysis.html
http://www.cbc.ca/canada/newfoundland-labrador/story/2009/03/24/aids-doctor.html
http://www.cbc.ca/canada/newfoundland-labrador/story/2009/03/24/eastern-health-radiologist.html

The point isn't that there is a crisis in health care. Of course there is. The point is that there is a crisis at the top of the Department of Health.

As we noted last week, Gomphus clavatus seems to have forgotten how to deal with the local media: http://orwellianspin.blogspot.com/2009/03/wisecrack.html

Now he seems to have forgotten how to keep an appointment. According to the Tely: "Health Minister Ross Wiseman didn’t show up for a morning address to a major conference in St. John’s on the development of an electronic health records system. Instead, parliamentary secretary for health, MHA Terry French stood in. Wiseman’s spokeswoman said he had a last minute meeting that kept him away." http://www.thetelegram.com/index.cfm?sid=237642&sc=79

Here is the original news release:http://www.releases.gov.nl.ca/releases/2009/health/0330n11.htm

There are two logical explanations:
1) He is so very, very busy that he cannot keep his appointments or deal with the press.
2) He is so very, very incompetent that he cannot keep his appointments or deal with the press.

What's the difference between the two? Nothing. Any competent minister has good enough skills with managing media relations -- and managing his/her own schedule -- that it's not necessary to use the utterly lame excuse of being too busy.

Dangovt is certainly a busyness-friendly administration.

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

You just had to know that Ranunculus sceleratus was going to sneak his way back into the Dandelion patch. With not much controversy (yet) generated by the budget, he was forced to go off broadway for some media action. Looks like he got it:
http://www.vocm.com/news-info.asp?id=35074
http://www.cbc.ca/canada/newfoundland-labrador/story/2009/03/27/kennedy-nurses-offer.html

Wow: off-script collective bargaining! What will the Eighth Floor think up next? Off-script government?

Here's Debbie Forward quoted in the Tely: "We've tried to respect the process all along ... we certainly expected government to respect this process, and it appears today they are not doing that." http://www.thetelegram.com/index.cfm?sid=236437&sc=79

What a week. It's been hard to keep up with the steady stream of Golden Oldies. Yesterday, we had the Carpenters. Now it's Aretha Franklin: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MrV0c9ETnWo

There is a difference with this performance, however. This is one of those duets where the two singers belt it out in competition rather than cooperation: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TolafQhqh7w

Jerome and Debbie, together again, singing off-key again, arguing about respect. Again.

Out of all the unions to pick on, Dangovt targets the nurses. They say they are masters of the universe, but they cannot negotiate a deal with nurses. DW's attitude was summed up by his attempt at humour: http://www.thetelegram.com/index.cfm?sid=217282&sc=82

It's not so funny, however, when you have family in need of surgery. It's not so funny when their health depends on nurses. It's not so funny when Dangovt wants to turn collective bargaining into a media circus. But I guess they've done their polling, so now it's time for a shaft.

Out of Body Experiences

Well, Ranunculus sceleratus Kennedyus finally got his photo in the media:
http://www.vocm.com/news-info.asp?id=35053

But his voice seems to have changed. See the accompanying audio clip at:
http://www.vocm.com/

At CBC, he got a photo (though a less flattering one than VOCM's), but still no actual quoted words. Unfortunately, this story comes with no accompanying audio clip, so we don't know whether the vocal problem is permanent:
http://www.cbc.ca/canada/newfoundland-labrador/story/2009/03/26/budget-preview.html

Still, an out-of-body experience is better than none at all. At least Ranunculus sceleratus got a moment in the dandelion patch.

More Wisecracks

It is, as I've said many times, a target rich environment. I don't mean to pick on Gomphus clavatus, but these rhetorical nuggets just jumped off the computer screen.

Here are extracts from yesterday's Hansard, in response to questions from the Opposition. To be fair to the ministers, I've copied their entire responses, with the quotable bits in bold:

MR. WISEMAN: Mr. Speaker, what I said yesterday in the media was in response to some questions around dialysis services in Labrador West. What I indicated clearly was that as a health department, as a minister, we had not had any representation from the community at large or from the health authority. We have four health authorities in this Province, I say, Mr. Speaker, and they have a really significant purpose in the delivery of health services in the respective parts of the Province.
The Labrador Grenfell Authority has a responsibility in Labrador and the Northern part of the Island portion of the Province. They, as a part of their planning exercise and a part of their exercise in putting forward to government requests for either funding or support for program initiatives, have not approached our department or me, as the minister, or government in any way, about having dialysis services in Lab City.
You may recall, Mr. Speaker, about a year or so ago I joined my colleague and we opened a new dialysis service in Happy Valley-Goose Bay.
MR. SPEAKER: Order, please!
I ask the hon. minister to complete his answer.
MR. WISEMAN: Thank you, Mr. Speaker.
Dialysis services, as a range of other programs that we introduce in a variety of areas of the Province, come about as a result of local regional planning from our health authorities who, in turn, make representation to government.

MR. WISEMAN: Mr. Speaker, it is interesting, you know, the question got framed initially in what I knew as a minister. What was interesting is she referenced the Cameron Inquiry. What was really interesting, one of the pivotal turning points identified by Justice Cameron was a Dr. Ejeckam letter in 2003. That 2003 letter happened on their watch, I say, Mr. Speaker. We weren’t in government at that time.
When we start talking about what ministers know and what ministers do not know, at an operational level, as a minister, we would not necessarily have any idea what is happening on a day-to-day basis at an operational level at many of our authorities, so it is a natural, normal process for us to rely on health authorities to identify health needs in respective areas of the Province.
Now, with respect to the issue of Port aux Basques, I met with the council in Port aux Basques last year in Corner Brook. We had a discussion around the issue as I understand it now, some representation of the community as well as the health authority –

MR. WISEMAN: Mr. Speaker, I can report that we are making great progress. We have done a lot of work. There have been a number of people who have been involved in this exercise, and I would like to be in a position in the very near future to make some further announcements to the House. I am sure the people of Newfoundland and Labrador will be quite impressed with the work that we have done and the future direction that we are mapping out for long-term care and community supports in this Province, and in particular the whole home support piece.

MR. WISEMAN: Thank you, Mr. Speaker.
As we have gone through this process – well, I can only speak for the time that I have been minister - during the last two years since I have been in my portfolio, I have had numerous discussions with a variety of not just individuals but organizations who are involved in health services in this Province, whether it is the Regional Health Authorities, agencies who are involved in the direct delivery of services, or individuals themselves who are involved in the direct delivery of services; but, most importantly, numerous individual families and individuals who are receiving home supports themselves have been very much engaged in the discussion.
I make reference particularly to the consultations we have done on healthy aging a few years ago, where we spoke to about 1,000 people, over seventeen communities. I suspect that is probably the most extensive consultation any government has ever done in this Province on any one single issue.

Not to be outdone, here is Digitaria cruciata Burkeia's response to the following question: Would government act to change the existing legislation governing Memorial University such as to accept those recommendations and can we expect such legislation changes taking place before a new president is selected?

MS BURKE: Mr. Speaker, with regards to the selection for a President of Memorial University, the Chair of the Board of Regents outlined a process that will be followed to select the chair at this time and he laid it out in a very clear, concise manner. It is a very open and transparent process and it is certainly one that government agrees with. So, that process will continue. What I had been asked and I want to clarify, based on the report from the ad hoc committee that came into government, we were asked to engage in discussions and we will certainly do that. As I said, I met with the Board of Regents as recently as yesterday and they will get back to us about how they want to proceed with discussions. That has been the request that came with that report from the Board of Regents and we certainly will follow up with the Board of Regents.

Here's the link: http://www.assembly.nl.ca/business/hansard/ga46session1/09-03-24.htm

Wisecrack

It turns out that Gomphus clavatus Wisemanius is not happy to be kept in the dark alone:
http://orwellianspin.blogspot.com/2009/03/political-biology.html

Mr. Gomphus clavatus issued an invitation to the media to bask in his greetings:
http://www.releases.gov.nl.ca/releases/2009/health/0323n11.htm

But then the eighth-floor phone rang, and he changed his mind and banished the media to the waiting room: http://www.thetelegram.com/index.cfm?sid=235079&sc=79

I hope the media get there early. From what I've been told, our waiting rooms are crowded these days.

Political Biology

Since 2003 different types of analysis have been used to understand Danvironment, some more successful than others. So I thought I'd apply a biological analysis to see if it yields any fruit.

A systematic biological analysis has produced a working taxonomy of five principal species:

1) Digitaria cruciata Burkeia (Crabgrass). This crabby organism is remarkably persistent, despite frequent use of media herbicides. It is arguably the least sophisticated of the grasses found in Dangarden, but what it lacks in intelligence it makes up for in guile. Studies of its growth pattern indicate that it cannot be induced to change its behaviour.

2) Gomphus clavatus Wisemanius (Mushroom). This fungus thrives when kept in the dark. Unlike crabgrass, it wilts when placed in sunlight and is vulnerable to media herbicides. Its intelligence is impossible to determine because it seems unable to remember anything, but it is effective at remaining in place. Studies of its growth pattern indicate that it responds to crises by going into stasis.

3) Trifolium repens Dunderdalia (Clover). This member of the pea family actually covers the most surface area in Dangarden. However, while it takes up considerable space, it's relatively inactive and does little to attract attention. Its green leaves blend in with its surroundings and, like crabgrass, it appears to be resistent to media herbicides. Studies of its growth pattern indicate that once entrenched across an area, it is nearly impossible to remove.

4) Ranunculus sceleratus Kennedyus (Buttercup). This brightly coloured flower is new to Dangarden, so it's unclear how it will thrive among the other plants. It is highly active and seems to enjoy the spotlight. Unlike the mushroom, it wilts when placed in the dark. Its bright yellow colour can rival the dandelion, which may prove fatal to its long-term viability. Studies of its growth pattern indicate that it is abrasive and combative, particularly when it grows near hospitals.

5) Taraxacum officinale Dannydius (Dandelion). This toxic plant is the most dominant and aggressive of all. It spreads at an alarming speed and, if left unchecked, can take over an entire assembly of plants. Despite its colourful and festive appearance, it is highly poisonous and can be fatal if consumed over more than two terms in power. Even when boiled before eaten, it produces serious intestinal disorders and brain cramps. Studies of its growth pattern indicate that it has become resistent to reality-based herbicides. Political biologists believe that this is due to its remarkable ability to soak up attention. The only known way to remove the dandelion successfully is to yank it out completely, along with its entire root system.


Observational notes from the field update:
It looks like it will be a good spring for the Dandelion, as it's now generating not only national editorial attention, but also archival national editorial attention:
http://www.theglobeandmail.com/servlet/story/RTGAM.20090308.weArchive09/BNStory/specialComment/home